Reflection

I have been feeling a little bit numb today and its not because of the cold grey weather, it is because of grief and pain. Some days my heart aches for the loss of my best friend and some days I can smile, laugh, and be happy. I have so many memories with Matt and when I think about them I laugh, smile, and cry all at the same time. I am over joyed that I was able to be so close to Matt and to share so many memories and things with him. He was truly my best friend. I know he is still watching over me and helping me get through this time of my life. I feel him with me constantly and I know he is with all the people who love him. I have to live each day, one day at time and it is getting a little bit easier, but my heart still physically hurts when I look back on the day that I found out my best friend had died. I can do this I know I can! I miss you and love you Elder Matthew Lawrence Knoop.






New Years 2007!





I have the best friends in the world, we will all miss Matt and continue being the best friends.






This is exactly who Matt and I are.... DORKS! We had so much fun together at Utah State and I cherish that time I was able to spend with him everyday. We were punks and everyone knew it! Matt gave me that orange trucker hat the night before he left because he knew how much I hated it when he wore it. I still have it.






This picture is hilarious! This was our first USU Howl... Matt was Hugh Hefner and I was Daisy Duke, hahah the funny thing is Matt wouldn't normally be caught dead in this costume. He did save me all night long from the many creepers. He was always looking out for me.






I took this picture right before one of our intramural soccer games up at Utah State.... We were the only two good or should I say awesome players on the team! Matt was constantly yelling at me, but in the end was always amazed at my skills! He always forced me to work harder and do better and he still is!






I had the lucky opportunity to wear Matt's soccer number on my stomach at the state soccer finals (which they won)! He loved it! I think his mom took 20 pictures of just me and him hahah.... I always loved Matt's drive on the soccer field. All growing up his dad was our soccer coach and had the same drive, he taught me to have that drive and Matt just kept teaching me.






This was during our Senior trip to St. George... We all had a blast and to this day laugh about the events that occurred on this trip. This was on our hike of Angels Landing and on the way down Matt kept referring to the chain you hold on to as the Iron Rod... He was always setting an example no matter where we were or who we were with. That is how he left this world.





Matt hated taking pictures, but Liz and I insisted on him taking pictures of us at Seminary graduation. He is the reason we graduated. He always told us we had to go to Seminary!





Senior prom was the greatest... I remember the night before Matt locked Connor (my date) and I in a room to "make out" while he very "sneakily" tried to spy on us not making out from the bedroom window. He thought he was so hilarious! That is something I loved about him.






This is a picture of Matt and I at our Graduation Party, we sat next to each other basically for 4 days and I don't know if Matt could have taken it much longer, but I wouldn't have wanted to share that with anyone else, but him and I know he felt the same ha!